March 5, 2013

HERE WE GO AGAIN!!

At times it feels too soon to start this whole thing over again and yet at others it feels like it can’t come soon enough.  We were talking on the plane ride home from Ethiopia about how excited we were to do it all again.  Crazy we know, but when you love someone that much your reasoning skills are a bit impaired.  Thankfully, as always, God gave us the sense to let Bona get settled before we started the whole process again.  Well, he is settled now!  More than settled, this kid is amazing.  And so even in the midst of complete chaos (selling house and unsure where we will live next), Here we go again, and we honestly couldn't be any more thrilled.
With this process starting all over again we have been reminded of what an amazing support system we have.  It was that support that got us through Bona’s adoption with grace, humility, and patience.  So it is no surprise to us that people are already coming along side us as we are in the beginning stages of adoption #2.  And many people have had questions about how this time will be the same or different from Bona’s process.  So we thought we could compile a list for you.  Of course we will never know all the things until this adoption is complete, but below is a quick look at what we know now.

Things that are the same:
·  We are OVER THE MOON excited to bring a child into our family!!
·  We know without a shadow of a doubt that God has already chosen our child even though we don’t yet know who he is.
·  We would like to adopt another little boy!  Although God may have a little girl in mind, and that would be perfectly ok as well. 
·  We still have no idea if we can have biological children because we have not felt called to that and may never feel called to add to our family that way.
·  We are still just two people (plus one) seeking to do God’s will in our lives.  We are not some amazing altruistic family who deserves praise or admiration.  We just feel God’s nudge to adopt again and so we are letting him lead the way. (see here to read more about this.)
·  We still have lots of paperwork and bureaucracy (both US and Ethiopian) to get through before we can bring our child home.  But as we realized last time God works out all those details.  So it won’t change the frustrations but we do have more peace about all of these things working out.
·  We plan to stay in Ethiopia again for an extended period of time.  We were there a total of 9 weeks with Bona’s adoption.  And it was amazing!  We can’t wait to go back and see our friends. (see here to read more about our first time staying in Ethiopia)
·  We are going to need a lot of support and love along the way.  Even though we have a better idea of what is coming, it is still an emotional roller coaster   We will need prayers and shoulders to cry on, and friends to celebrate with in the moments of joy. (see here to read more about how our friends and family helped us through)
·  We still have no idea about the timing.  But again we have peace that the child waiting for us is already picked out and that God will work out the details.  It doesn't mean that we don’t want our child home right now, because we do!  It also doesn't mean that we won’t be frustrated by the timing, because every day we aren't with our son is another he is missing out on complete attention and love from his forever family.  And it is another day Bona has to go without being able to love on and get to know his big brother.  We will find joy in this time of waiting, but we may not always be happy about not having our son with us.

Things that are different:
·  We are using a different adoption agency.  Bona’s adoption was through Holt. This adoption will be through Bethany Christian Services.  If you are interested in adoption and would like to know why we switched we would be happy to talk to you more about the details.
·  Our next child will likely be older.  So Bona man will have a big brother. We are asking that Big Bro be no more than 3 years older than Bona so around 4 years of age. We are currently trying to teach him to say “Big Brother” see the video.

·  We have someone to occupy our time while we wait!  Having Bona certainly changes the dynamic.  As I mentioned before we still want to have our son home as soon as possible but having Bona will remind us why the wait is worth it!
·  We are open to more medical issues.  Before Bona we didn't know if we could handle certain medical problems.  But now that we have a child that we love more than life itself we realize that would not change if he had a medical issue!  We won’t go into the details too much, but if it comes up we will pray pray pray for God to guide us and show us which issues we can handle and which issues would be better cared for by another family.
·  This time around we also know a lot more about Ethiopia and the conditions our son will most likely be living in, which give us more peace of mind.  Although they were not ideal (no orphanage is) they were pretty great considering.  Bona got lots of love and attention, was well fed and well cared for and we pray that our next child is receiving the same.  In fact every time we pray we ask God for someone to give our child a hug or kiss.  We will never know if that is happening but God can do many things so it certainly doesn't hurt to ask!
·  Big Bro will not come from the same care center that Bona was living. (Unless God has some crazy plan in store)
·  And lastly the biggest difference is that we have a completely different perspective on life. We had NO IDEA how madly and deeply we would love our son. Of course we assumed a lot of things but we really had no idea!  It is that love and that desire to share it with another child that is driving this adoption.   
So whether you are reading our blog for the first time or you have been following our journey from the beginning, we pray that you read this with an open heart.  We are sharing and have shared our journey because it is evidence of God’s amazing power and blessing.  We are ordinary but our story is extraordinary because of what God has orchestrated.  That the logistics of adoption are worked out is a miracle in and of itself.  Not to mention a hundred other stories we could tell of God’s amazing hand at work.  We have never felt the love of God has clearly and profoundly as we did through the process of adoption and that is why we share!  We can’t keep something like that to ourselves.  And most importantly the reason we share our experience on this blog is because we hope it will inspire others to consider adoption for their families as well.  It doesn’t matter how old, young, wealthy, poor, married not married, God calls us to care for the orphans, JAMES 1:27. We hope that our story will spark something in you to pray and ask God how he can use you to care for those less fortunate.  Just prepare yourself because he might ask for something pretty big in return.  And if you answer we promise you will never regret your choice to follow hard after the Lord!  So here we go again!  And we pray that some of you may consider starting the same journey yourself!

2 comments:

  1. Jose & I are SO excited for your new journey! We will join you in prayer and follow along as you blog. Soon, we will begin our journey as well. You can follow us at Adifferentkindabeauty.blogspot. We will be in touch!

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  2. SO very excited for you guys to be parents again!! You are amazing parents, and we LOVE you both and Bona so much. We are also nervous? anxious? because we know the road won't always be easy, knowing you will go through hard struggles again, even though they are TOTALLY worth it. However, hard times are just that: hard doesn't necessarily mean bad, just really hard even if it is for a good reason. Your parenting starts now, thinking, loving, praying, worrying about your son, and we will think about him too. We are saying this to be encouraging, as loving friends....100% in support of your family and decision, through the ups AND downs this next adoption will bring. Love you guys!

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